"I love you. Remember that."

I lay awake

wondering about what lies ahead

will i make it to the heavens?

or will i just become a part of the ground?

i hold on to your words

"I love you. remember that"

I will remember for as long as i live

but what about after that?

What you lost was special to you

and I know you don't want it to happen to me

but will I remember you?

will I recognize your familiarities?

your smiles, your laughter?

My intentions are highly religious

I know I will make it to my heaven

My sanctuary.

Will my memories follow me?

I love you too. Remember that.

Daryl Atkins was 'mildly' mentally retarded

Daryl Atkins. He has been on death row since 1996. He claims to be mentally retarded and I.Q tests show that he is  "mildly" retarded. Does this mean he shouldn't deserve to die. He technically robbed and killed a man. If the whole world went by the 'eye for an eye' rule, he would be dead. But his mental problems come into play. The constitution says that there shouldn't be cruel and unusual punishment. But recent I.G tests sya that he has an I.Q of 76. IN virginia yiu are legally mentally retarded when you have an I.Q of 70 or lower. SInce he didnt have a test at the time of the crime, no one knows what his I.Q was or if he was mentally retarded. 

My pinion is simple. I dont know. All of these factors play huge roles in the outcome. I dont know what to think of it. Murder is wrong in any cases. You cant help being retarded though. All f my theories contradict each other. I dont know. 

my american dream.

 

I don’t really have an ULTIMATE DREAM. But I do have an ideal life style that I would like to follow. So lets hear from ,my future self –

 

I went to college in New Hampshire. I majored in Music production. It was fun. I almost didn’t get in the school because I was with my friends way too much and I didn’t have any time for studying. I need to start focusing on the more important things.

 

…I GRADUATED. I’m going to move to the city. NYC! Yeah! Ever since I was a little girl I knew that New York City was my home. Whenever I’m there I feel different. I mean, the skyscrapers, the lights, the people! I can’t even describe how much I love it. ANYWAYS, I get a crappy apartment because the nicer ones are REALLY expensive. To pay rent I work as a waitress at Juniors. It’s not much, but it’s a start.

 

 

For a learning experience, I work as an intern for a radio show. It allows me to meet lots of people. After work one day, I see me childhood friends. (Shaun, J.T, Glenn, and a new kid that I don’t know). We exchange the clichéd lines of  “ its been so long” and “hows everything”. They tell me that they are in a band and they are unsigned. Glenn as vocals, Shaun as drums, and J.T as bass and they unfamiliar and realllllyyyy attractive guy is on guitar. They then realize I’m working as a intern for a popular radio station. I guess they assumed that I would have some connections and new some people (which I did.) They asked if I could be there manager for their band. I quickly agreed and did a outstanding job. I booked them many shows and before I knew it, we started touring the country.  Its just really hard. Since im around so many “rock stars” there is a lot of drug use, It’s hard to resist but I know that if I do it will mess me up forever.

 

The really hot guitarist and me are together. Its becoming really serious. I always thought I would be tempted to cheat on him. But I know I wont, even though the temptation is still there, He decided he wants to go solo since the band wasn’t right for him. He released an album that sold 100000 copies. He’s becoming REALLY famous. He is about to start a tour that is from New York to California and all the states in between.

 

We decided to make our own band. Me and him. ( and 2 other guys). IM on vocals, he’s on guitar. It’s a popish punk band. We are touring the nation. And we are about to embark on our world tour.

 

When we stopped in Spain. He took me to a really remote beach. The sun was setting and he proposed. It was perfect. We decided that after the tour we would settle own in a small suburb town. I already applied for a job. Its to be a music teacher at a highly respected private school.

 

After the wedding we moved into a 4 bedroom house. We are planning on having 6 kids. Right now we have 2 kids. A boy named Gerard James, he is six months old. The other is Austin and he is one and a half. I got that teaching job and it pays really well. Im expecting twins in 6 months. We are all doing great. MY life has been great so far.

 

 

unnecessary

Im sitting in environmental biology. Eighth period. Im not sure what they are asking of me, but I'm in no way of doing it. I finished my podcast last night and they are telling me to make it more science-y.  What the hell does that even mean. My thing is on tigers not the scientology theory of science. I am clearly making no sense but i have a reason for this rant. This is EXTREMELY unnecessary. Tic. Tic. Tic. my eyes are glued on the clock. 2:37. 14 more minutes.. jeez.

The reason for my rant is that I'm so sick of people telling me what to do. Like I understand that im going to be told what to do for the rest of my life but.... this is so unnesssary. Im tired of the clean-your-rooms instead of the do-your-homeworks. I shouldnt be nagged constantly for somthing that has no importance to anything. Like cleaning my room has no importance to what i will achieve in life.  'profanity inserted here'. This is so frustrating. >:0